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Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Strive for Self-Awareness


A message from Intuitive Specialist Joan Marie Whelan

Self-realization is vital for one's awareness and acceptance of self in all stage of one's life. It is part of our spiritual journey but it also benefits us greatly in our physical, emotional and mental paths as well. It is through our individual passage through time that we have the opportunity and the responsibility to become enlightened about the process and our progress during this passage.

When we are more aware of what truly makes us do what we do and live the way we live, we are also better prepared to live with an improved degree of compassion, kindness and appreciation for each step along the way.

PRACTICE self-awareness so that you can experience self-realization. Our primary goal is to live each day with a greater understanding of our experiences and why we are encountering them. This is your time to view your life's story and become the person that you desire to be, not someone that has been led by another.

Joan Marie

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Why Should I Care if you don’t?

Why Should I Care if you don’t?

That’s the premise around people who are around people looking for respect.

I’ve heard women say about guys that he doesn’t respect her. I’ve heard people say that they’ve been disrespected. Where does that come from? To be sure, there are people who haven’t learned to be respectful as well as those that are disrespectful on purpose, but these are small numbers compared to general disrespect that occurs on daily basis in and outside the home. It goes back to the sayings; you reap what you sow and what comes around goes around.

First you have to respect others if you want them to respect you. More important, you have to respect yourself.  It’s a fundamental requirement for you to respect others. If you don’t respect yourself it’s difficult to give the same courtesy to someone else.

Therefore getting back to why should I care, when you care about yourself it shows and people will respond in kind. It’s a demand you expect from others and a confidence you exude that basically states this is who I am and these are my ground rules if you wish to be with me. It’s saying I respect myself and therefore won’t compromise my values and morals. I won’t let you treat me in any way that is detrimental to my self-esteem. If you can’t do that then you will not be a part of my life. I value and love myself to much to be around someone who won’t treat me as such.

When you care about yourself, and I mean that in many ways, it shows. Without even saying word people can tell those who care about themselves from those that don’t and are given respect automatically.

Respect yourself enough to care about yourself. 

Monday, November 2, 2015

You Get What You Get and You Don’t Throw a Fit

You Get What You Get and You Don’t Throw a Fit

That is the saying the pre-school teachers teach the kids so they won’t complain about what another child received over them.  It’s a good lesson all of us could learn from.

How many times do you hear someone complain about the new car, boat, promotion or house their friend or neighbor got?  In essence they’re saying, “What about me?  What makes that person so much more special than me? Why can’t I get something good like that too?”

That same thing could be said about your talents, physical appearance or your intelligence.  You’ve got attributes and so does everyone else around you.  Your attributes don’t look the same as the other guy and that’s a good thing. You’re unique so they shouldn’t be.  Trouble is, for some reason the grass always seems to look greener on the other side.  With all this attention looking outward at other people, it’s no wonder you don’t realize how swell you truly are.  In the effort to notice what you don’t have you fail to recognize and appreciate what you do have. So what ends up happening, you end up feeling bad about yourself because you compared yourself to someone else and nothing compares to you. 

You are a “One and Only.” The mold was broke when you were born so get use to it.

So what did you get? Did you get the smarts of an engineer, the vocabulary of a writer/speaker or the compassion of a volunteer? The point is you did get talents just like everyone else did but only you can express them in your own unique way and that’s what makes you stand out.

Sometimes it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what it is you have to offer but you must make the commitment to discover your unique abilities.  You must be clear about who-you-are so that you can build your life around what makes you shine.  You deserve to have all the world has to offer.  Recognize appreciate and use what you have and you won’t be throwing anymore fits.

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Everybody Makes Mistakes

EVERYBODY makes mistakes. EVERYONE has those days.

It’s what you do afterwards that separates the winners from the losers, the “haves” from the “has beens”.

It comes down to choices. You can choose to dwell in the negative aspect of the issue or make a choice to learn from it and move on

Quite a few people without even being conscious of it, continue to dwell on the mistakes they’ve made like continuously bringing up a failed relationship, job or what could have been. They’re living in the past. By bringing up the details and hence the feelings that accompanied the situation, the person is basically reliving it. Well, you can’t improve your future if you’re always living in the past. It’s best to learn from the mistake, let it go and move on.

Everyone makes mistakes and this one is yours. Own up to it. The hardest part is accepting the mistake and being able to consciously and unconsciously acknowledge it. “Boy did I screw up”. When you can accept it within that framework you’re half way there. The next part is to figure out what went wrong and vow not to get sucked into that kind of mistake again.

You see you’ll keep making these kinds of mistakes until you learn the lesson, over and over again. It’s like the guy who complains that his wife or girlfriend is a drama queen so he breaks it off only to get another woman who is also a drama queen, same brand - different model. Everyone else can see the similarities in the women even though he swears this new gal is different. He needs to find a different brand.

Finally, you’re not alone. As perfect as everyone else may appear to be, everyone makes mistakes. Some people just know how to brush it off and keep move on.

Monday, October 26, 2015

The Government Doesn’t Owe You a Thing

The Government Doesn’t Owe You a Thing

“My boss owes me. Work owes me. The government owes me. You own me.” Where does this entitlement mentality come from?

It’s looking for others to fill a void, to make the person feel good about himself.  For some reason he feels he has been wronged and wants others to give him, in his own mind, his just reward, payback, to make life fair again, to even the score. 

The problem is there is not enough money, time, possessions, education, or love to satisfy this person because he’ll NEVER be satisfied. As soon as one thing is catered to he’ll either complain that it’s not quite up to par or too late in coming. He’ll then focus on other things that he still hasn’t been compensated for.  It’s a never-ending cycle of unfilled expectations.  The entitlement mentality continues and the only way to remedy it is to go to the source. The answer, the fulfillment, lies within.

No one else can make him happy about his current situation but himself.  He created his life and he has the freedom to make the choices to change it. He can’t change the past because it’s over and done with.  He needs to accept whatever happened in the past because it has made him who he is today. Does he want to change that?  If so, then change it.  It doesn’t happen overnight but takes a conscious effort to make choices that will eventually lead to his desired outcome.

The entitlement attitude comes from not wanting to take responsibility for what has happened in his life.  It’s so much easier to blame someone or something else for his obstacles.  The focus then is not on him but on anything else.  He then gets to feel good about himself because in his mind it’s someone else’s fault.  However, the longer he continues to believe that the cause of his shortcomings are someone else’s responsibility, the longer it will take for him to make the choices that will eventually bring him the happiness and love he so desperately is seeking.  

You see, the “feel good” feeling he craves isn’t given to him by someone else but is something he gives himself.  When he can empower himself to take charge and create his life as he wishes instead of allowing himself to be a victim, the happier he will be.

Thursday, October 22, 2015

Are you Accepting or Tolerant?

Are you Accepting or Tolerant?

Some people would believe that they’re one and the same but they’re not.

There’s so much talk now about being tolerant but really the people who are advocating for tolerance actually want acceptance.

What’s the difference?

Tolerance is coming from the mindset that you will put up with a viewpoint, position and/or way of life that you really don’t care for or agree with while acceptance comes from love.

Acceptance is separating the viewpoint, position or way of life from the person. It loves the person despite the difference or disagreement you have about the person’s viewpoint, position and/or way of life.

The difference is HUGE in its concept and use.

The word tolerant in itself whispers of resistance. It assumes that a person’s viewpoint is wrong and therefore it must be corrected by forcing a person to be tolerant of an opposing viewpoint.  When a person is shamed into being tolerant there’s an internal compass that still remains telling the person this is wrong and hence resentment is born. The person is forced into doing and being something they’re not. In reality NOTHING really has changed.

Acceptance is different in that it advocates for people respecting other people’s choices even if they don’t agree with them. In an acceptance environment it would be perfectly acceptable to disagree with the viewpoint, position and/or way of life, not in a mean or put down kind of way, but matter of fact. I’m me and you’re you. It’s okay that we disagree. I don’t have to like or agree with your viewpoint. You go along with your business and I’ll go along with mine. I’ll respect your viewpoint, position, or way of life if you respect mine. 

The world would be a much better place if people practiced acceptance versus advocating for tolerance.

Monday, October 19, 2015

Tune Out the Media Hype

Tune Out the Media Hype

They promote fear.  Take your pick they pretty much go by the flavor of the month.  Today its terrorists, tomorrow it’s the budget, and the next its immigration.  That’s not to say that all news is promoting fear.  I do want to know what’s happening with the budget and what the weather will be like.  However, there comes a point when a shift is made between reporting and speculating by bringing up all the possible scenarios on how it could possibly play out in a negative way. And that is the key, could.  It doesn’t mean that it will, it just means it could happen. And then you know what happens, people start talking about it in a negative way and the facts start to get fuzzy.  What is the truth and what is speculating?  As the character in the show Dragnet would say, “Just the facts.”

To get the Law of Attraction to work, you don’t want to give attention to the negative, only the positive but that’s not what is stressed in the media. Instead of focusing on all the money that will be made, the jobs that will be created and the prosperity that will follow, the focus in on debt, bad economy and high unemployment .  Then what do we get, more debt, more lack in economic growth and increased unemployment.

Great leaders know what to do and say to bring everyone’s attention to what we want, the positive not the negative. Great leaders keep the vision at the forefront of our consciousness and not necessarily on the details.

Where attention goes energy flows.  Think prosperity, visualize success, feel the rush.   

Thursday, October 15, 2015

No Apology Necessary


No apology necessary. Why should there be. You’re just being you.

You are who you are. Did you hurt anyone physically, emotionally, financially or verbally? If not, then you’re okay just the way you are.

No one could possibly fathom what you’ve been through affects you.

No one should feel the need to apologize for being their self.

Sure you won’t always fit into what normal is but who really does? We all have quirks in our personality. We all have times when we really give a hoot about how we look. We all have facets of our personality that don’t’ always blend with others. So what! As the saying goes, there’s someone out there for everyone. Your tribe is out there somewhere. It’s our idiosyncrasies which make us unique.

On the flipside, wouldn’t it be boring if we were all the same. Think about that for a moment. What if everyone was good looking, had the same accent, language, earnings, house, vehicle, education, relationships? Where would the interest in your fellow human being go? It’s our differences that make others seek us out to find out what makes us tick.

Therefore embrace who you are. You make the world a more interesting place to be.

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Garbage in Garbage out

Garbage in  Garbage out

That’s the way the Law of Attraction works in modern terms.  For every action there is a reaction. When you decide ahead of time what reaction you want the action to take reveals itself.

For example, if you borrow money to spread more love around, you’ve made a sound investment and love is reciprocated; if you borrow money to get out of trouble, trouble starts to expand because the attention is on the trouble.

Which would you rather have, more love or more money? Money is just energy and the energy that you attach to it is what you’ll get in return.  The laws of physics are very clear on this.  Action/reaction runs the universe whether it’s evidenced in a family, government, a classroom or a group as small as five people.  The universe reciprocates what it receives, value for value.

In the work environment you’re expected to give a fair day’s work for a fair day’s pay.  And yet you will hear about or see employees who are constantly trying to get out of working but still expect a full day’s pay.  In fact, they work harder at not working than actually doing the job.  The irony is that these same people end up being the main complainers about their work and wonder why they can’t get a raise or promotion.   Physics works perfectly. The value of what they gave is what they got in return.  In this case the employee is stuck in his own self pity and therefore he believes the problem lies outside himself.  He hasn’t learned that he has the power to improve his situation through his own mindset. If he made the mental attitude shift to see the value in his contribution he would receive the value back. He would start to get those raises and promotions.  It’s fairly common that the vast majority of employees that get promoted often have already been doing some or the entire job before they got the promotion.

This quote sums it up pretty well.

“Action/reaction is a little like bad mitten.  It isn’t the speed with which you swat that wins the game.  It’s the finesse with which you deliver the shot” ~ Betsy Otter Thompson, Walking Through Illusion.

If you’d like to discover ways in which the Law of Attraction shows up in the bible, I suggest you check out Betsy’s book.  You can find it on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Remember how to have fun

Remember how to have fun

Remember as a child, just the sight of a swing set, or a pony, or a hula-hoop, would get your heart racing and your imagination somersaulting?

And without even thinking in words you felt that surely the world revolved around you, that you were the most blessed creature ever to live, and that having fun was all that really mattered?

Well, how did you know so much at such a tender age?

~ The Universe

Not much has changed. You still get excited only the events and objects have changed to hugs of children, the heart-felt conversations with friends, and the trip of a life time.

You still are the most blessed creature to ever live and having fun still matters to you.  Remember?

Get use to it.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

Money is the Route to Freedom


Money is the route to freedom. It gives us freedom to do what we want. It takes away fear.  It’s what will give you all the tangible things you desire.

Desiring money tends to get a bad rap but that typically comes from the viewpoint of how you were raised and what influenced you when you were growing up.  You may have been brought up to believe that money is the route of all evil or that money doesn’t grow on trees. The fact is money is energy and it doesn’t care what you do with it.  It isn’t money that gives money a bad rap but the entity that uses it. It makes you more of what you already are.  Therefore, the guy who is greedy by nature will become greedier if he has more money.  Likewise the person who has always been a compassionate person will find more ways to show their compassion.  The bad rap emerged because history is filled with people, companies, and government that have used it for power or control and nobody likes that.  It also can be viewed as a source of security.  However, all these viewpoints come from a place of fear whereas when it comes from a place of freedom it’s coming from a love based emotion.

The word freedom means not to have an attachment to something; free to come and go with no limitations or restrictions.  Therefore, if you’re holding yourself back from being all that you can be because you think it will change you, ask yourself if you like yourself just the way you are, more money will make you more of what you already are.  What great things could you do and be if you had more money? What could you do to help out people you care about if you had more money like buying a new house for your Mom or sending your parents on a European vacation? You would have more choices, more fun.

If you haven’t noticed, most celebrities, professional athletes and business owners have a favorite cause or charity that they are involved in. They are grateful for what they have and want to share what they can with others.  Money for them has been a route to freedom, freedom to do and be what they choose.  Now, wouldn’t you like to be on the route to freedom?

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

What You Attract is What You Are?

What You Attract is What You Are?

You don’t attract that which you want but that which you already are.  Therefore, if you want to attract what you want, then you must be that.

In a practical sense, it’s always been said that you should dress for the job you want not the one you currently have and that those who already are doing the job get the promotion.  Our wishes and prayers are gratified and answered only when they harmonize with our thoughts and actions.  You get what you justly earned.

Another way of looking at it is by the saying, “Birds of a feather flock together.”  It’s not by accident that like people hang together, they’ve found a group that is like them at that moment in time.  Even if it may appear that the person doesn’t belong to a group, at some level there is an attraction to it. At times it could be strong like a magnet and other times it could be a slight tug.

People hang together because it makes them feel good about themselves. They’ve found others that agree with their values, goals and views.  However it doesn’t mean that it can’t be changed, it can, if the person chooses to make the change.  A smoker hangs out with other smokers because they have something in common.  At first they may not have much else in common but then slowly they develop a bond because of the habit.  A group is formed.

But before all this action takes place there had to be the initial thought to begin with.  It means the person had to have the thought to even pick up a cigarette and then the opportunity arose to make the action possible.  This scenario is played over and over for any kind of example you can think of be it for a behavior or action.  The thought comes first and then the action. Therefore, if you want better outcomes then you have to have better thoughts.  As it proclaims in the Book of Proverbs (23:7) “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he”.

Friday, September 18, 2015

There’s no Such Thing as Luck

There’s no Such Thing as Luck

What we call luck is actually the universe lining up to give the recipient what he has already envisioned. He not only has envisioned it but taken action on it.

It’s not luck that he got the job he wanted.  He worked at it bit by bit and positioned himself into it.  He verbally talked the talk and physically walked the walk. You probably have also done this but without the same results. 

Another part of this equation is he acted “as if” it was already his. He didn’t know how or when or even if this was the job for him, all he knew for sure is what it would look like when it presented itself. Lastly, when it did present itself he was willing to receive it.

What you want doesn’t always come to you on a silver platter. Sometimes it’s disguised as a setback or misfortune and just when you’re about to make an about face things begin to align in your favor.  That’s how it works.  That’s the Law of Attraction in motion.

Luck is you having a vision, focusing on it, believing in its manifestation, taking action and willing to receive it when it comes your way.

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

What’s Holding You Back?

What’s Holding You Back?

Do any of these statements sound like you?

·        I just can’t seem to get motivated to move forward.

·        I’ve been meaning to do that but I just haven’t got around to it.

·        I’m concerned about our financial situation.

·        I need a few drinks to calm me down again.

What do all these statements have in common ………….?  Give up?

They’re all based in fear.  Depression, procrastination, worry and addictions are all based in fear.  The fear could be just about anything like fear of success, fear of rejection, fear of failure and fear of the unknown to name a few.

When you’re in the state of fear you’re on the opposite side of the Principle of Polarity.  The Principle of Polarity basically states that there is an equal and opposite of everything.  It’s a universal law.  Therefore, just like there is hot/cold, black/white, up/down, question/answer there is love and fear.

Yes, the opposite of love is fear. You see there are really only two emotions; love based or fear based emotions.  If you’re not in a love based emotion then you’re in a fear based emotion and it’s easy to figure out which one you’re in.  Of course there are varying degrees to an emotion just like there is in hot/cold and black/white etc.

So what are some of these love based emotions that you want to strive for? They are feelings like; appreciation, kindness, joy, hope and optimism. The fear based emotions are just as easy to identify. The words alone have a negative connotation to them.  They are feelings like; sorrow, anger, discouraged, irritated and blame.

The first thing you need to do to change your fear based emotion into a love based emotion  to find happiness is to become aware of what you’re feeling.  Is it worry or procrastination? Identify which feeling based emotion you are feeling. Once you’ve figured that out you need to go deeper to figure out what you’re actually afraid of.  This may take some time but if you’re truly honest with yourself the answer will come.  All the outward signs of fear (worry, depression, addiction) are a cover up for something else that you don’t want to address.  It’s only when you figure out what the true fear is and take steps to resolve it do you truly begin to move from fear to love. 

There is a really good book in regards to this called, “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway”, by Susan Jeffers PHD. 

Monday, August 31, 2015

Hey! Where’s My Support?

How do you find a good support system? Well, you have to go out and create the kind of support system you want. Remember that people will be flattered by your interest in whatever you ask them. You will make them feel good just by asking or simply calling them. Pick someone you perceive as being a few steps ahead of you in personal growth. A good place to find such people is at self-improvement classes, workshops, or seminars.

What do I do when my mate is the one who is dragging me down? The thing to remember here is that the mate may look at this change as a personal rejection of him or her or that you will outgrow or find them unattractive as a mate. Communicating that you are still committed to the relationship and him/her and that you are seeking to become all that you can be is the key. The mate will have to make a decision as to whether they support you in that or not.

What we resist persists. Do you want to improve your life or not? Although the thought that your relationship could break down may be very frightening, in actuality I know of no one who has chosen the path of growth over his or her relationship who has regretted that choice.

Believe that your mate wants what is best for you and that he or she will ultimately love the positive changes in you.

Know that in all likelihood, as you start to take risks and grow, you are going to get resistance from people in your life. It's a given. It is their way of defending their security. What is important is that you know what is happening. It will also help if you acknowledge others when they are supporting you. Also, it will greatly help your understanding to know that one of the reasons we react so hostile when others don't support us is our need for approval. Whenever we get upset at the comments of loved ones, it is a clue that we are still acting like a child. Guilt is another clue. Guilt and hostility often mask our anger at ourselves and others for our not being able to break unhealthy ties with loved one. For example being able to say; "I love you but I have to live my own life". The less you need some one's approval, the more you are able to love them.

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Living the Glory Days


Are you living in the glory days, the memories of when you did this or that and it was a great experience in your life? Or perhaps you’re always bringing up the “should have”, “could have”, if only your past had been different.  Are you blaming others for you present situation because you’re not happy with it?

There’s nothing wrong with reminiscing about the good times as long as you don’t stay there. That’s the problem with both of these scenarios. Both are referring to the past one in a fond way and the other in a negative way. What’s good is that there is awareness about it. The problem is when you stay there.

As the Deli Lama says, there’s only place to be concerned about and the past isn’t one of them. The past is gone and there is nothing you can do about it. The future hasn’t arrived so there’s no sense in worrying about it. The only control you have is over the present. Now there is where things happen.

When you’re always thinking about the past that’s where your mind stays. Therefore it’s unable to make a better future. It’s what you do in the present that forms your future. If you want a new car start taking some kind of action on it today, do some research, ask friends, check out your money situation. You won’t be buying it today but you’ve already set the wheels in motion. Tomorrow or in a few days find out more information. Take some more action. Come up with a game plan to make it happen. Work the plan. Day by day you’ll be closer to your goal. Remember to stay focused on what you can do today. If you can’t do anything today then perhaps tomorrow or the next day you can take another action.

Living in the past isn’t going to get you anywhere only by living in the present moment can you affect change you wish to see in your life.

Monday, August 24, 2015

You Catch More Flies with Honey



You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.

It’s true, a good example of this was provided in the movie “To Sir with Love.”  The High School class was a bunch of misfits who were disrespectful and condescending to themselves and others.  They believed that things happened to them, that they were the victim of circumstance.  They looked outside themselves for the cause of what state of life they were in.

However, a pivotal point in the movie occurred when their teacher, played by Sidney Poitier, took them on a field trip. The students had to look presentable and were tasked with simple instructions in human interaction like asking for directions or holding a door open for someone.  One by one each student would try this simple exercise, first using their current behavior and then trying it again but changing it up a bit. What they discovered was by making a little tweak in how they represented themselves in approach, disposition, language and facial expression made all the difference in the world in how others responded to them.

When they used their current behavior they got ignored or put down but when they were cordial and polite, people responded in kind. I’m a firm believer in the honey approach.  If you’re not getting the reception you’d like perhaps you need to use some honey.

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Your Opinion is ALWAYS Right


Now doesn’t that make you feel good about yourself? Perhaps your self esteem just shot up but hold on a moment, everyone else is always right too.

How can that be? Isn’t there only one right answer?

Is it because you have the wisdom of the universe?

Is it because you’re a highly educated person?

Is it because your compassion for social and environmental issues transcends everyone else’s viewpoint?

Hardly! It’s not any of those.

It’s because your opinions are based on your social upbringing, economic situation, education, religion, race, gender, nationality and all the experiences you’re had. The choices you’ve made through life have gone through these filters whether you’re aware of them or not. There’s no way around it. You see life through these lenses, from this perspective.  Therefore, your opinions are formed through the lenses of your life. How could it be wrong then? It’s sifting all the information you have accumulated through these filters and then WA-LAH, your opinion is formed. In your mind it can’t be wrong. It’s understandable then why there can be disagreements about all kinds of issues with other people. Imagine everyone else is doing the same thing you’re doing, hearing and gathering the same information yet they come up with a different conclusion.

How is that possible? Now you know.

Be conscious of this scenario when you find yourself at odds with others. Everyone else has their own filters that information goes through. It doesn’t mean it’s wrong, it just means it’s different.

When I find myself at odds I’m always curious to find out how the person came up with a different conclusion. It usually comes down to the filters they’ve ran the information through while forming their opinion.

Bottom line - Give the other guy a break, his opinion is valid and right too from his perspective.

Monday, August 17, 2015

68 Seconds to an Awesome Life

Do you have 68 seconds to spare? Sure you do.  That’s all it takes to start creating the life you want. Sound too easy to be true doesn’t it?  It must be harder than that. Isn’t that what you’ve been taught?  If you want something you have to work hard to get it.  But what if it was easier than that? Wouldn’t you want to know what it is?

If you listen or follow life coaches and mind set gurus out there one of the primary goals that need to be achieved before you can get anywhere is to become REALLY clear on what you want. In other words, you need to get the Law of Attraction to work for you.  The universe doesn’t know what to send you if you keep sending mixed signals like changing your mind or wanting something but deep down believing it’s not possible.  You do it all the time.  I do it too.  But you can train yourself to change your mindset into believing it can come true. I’ll tell you how.

First off, your mind can’t tell the real from the imaginary.  Think of all the time you’ve been emotionally impacted (anxious, excited, sad, happy) watching a movie.  The events in the movie aren’t really happening but your thoughts about them being real are. That’s what brings about the emotion.  The mind is a magnificent thing.  Why not put it to good use then? Since the mind can’t distinguish the real from the imaginary why don’t you create the life you want in your mind and let the universe take care of the rest?

Here’s how it goes.   For 68 seconds write down how you want your life to be, not how it is.  List what kind of career you want, what will your home life be like, what kind of hobbies and events you will find yourself in and what will your average day feel like.  You can be as detailed as you like but remember you only have 68 seconds.  That’s all it takes to start shifting your mind from what’s happening now to what you want it to be.  This is how the Law of Attraction really works.  By writing down how you want it to be you become really clear and then the universe can do what it does best, manifest desires. Do this daily if need be.  If your day didn’t go the way you would have liked it to go, write down how you would like it to go tomorrow then. You’ve got 68 seconds. Ready, set, go!

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Will You Validate My Life?

That’s basically what groups in society are saying when they’re pressing the rest of society to accept them the way they are through bullying tactics, name calling, demonstrations, protests and the media.

They want to be accepted and feel they won’t be accepted until procedures, laws and society’s perception has changed to their liking. The sad part is NO ONE can give them that. No law will change it. No speech. No educational informative talk. It’s an elusive battle because even if laws are changed it doesn’t mean the whole of society’s heart and soul will change with it.

It’s a losing battle because acceptance comes from within not from the outside. Those who accept themselves exhibit a quiet confidence, knowingness, security and ultimately self-love for who they are.

It’s not important what others think of them only what they think of themselves. They don’t have to make noise by pushing their agenda onto anyone else because they know that no matter what they’re okay with themselves just the way they are.  

They don’t need anyone else’s permission to be who you are. They validate it on their own.

Monday, May 25, 2015

Life isn’t fair. Who said it was Supposed to be?


It just doesn’t seem fair that your sister is better looking than you.  It doesn’t seem fair that you brother is smarter than you, or is he?


Life isn’t fair.  Who said it was supposed to be?  In fact, it is not about being fair.  It’s about doing the best with what you have.  Sometimes people are so focused on what others have that they don’t see the fine qualities that they possess. If they did they’d realize that even though their sister is better looking and their brother is really smart- they have different qualities that the other two aren’t as gifted in.  It could be that they have the ability to connect with others in a short about of time, mediate and diffuse a situation, are blessed with the ability to speak well, to use well crafted words to illicit the response and emotion that they intended.  These things aren’t measured in the educational system and yet they are a tremendous asset. A case or push needs to be done to address this omission of overlooked talents. Credit needs to be given to those people who are naturally talented in other intelligences such as; nature, body, verbal, emotional, social, picture and music instead of basing someone’s intelligence strictly on logic which is evident in the sciences.  Life isn’t just about science, math, and reading.  Don’t get me wrong, these are all important.  What about all the people who aren’t talented in those subjects? They go through the school system believing that they won’t be successful just because they didn’t excel in the core subjects.  They aren’t failures.  How about building up their self esteem by giving them credit for what they are talented in? 


·        Everyone is talented in something.  Sometimes you have to look deeper to figure out where you stand out.  Ask yourself which of the intelligences you excel in.  Pinpoint exactly what it is that makes that great. 

·        Figure out what are your strengths and use them to your advantage.

·        Appreciate the character traits you have, even the quirky ones.

·        Learn to design your life around what you are naturally gifted in.


If you’d like to learn more about how to make your life run smooth, you can visit my website at Your True Heart's Desire.

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

The Solution for a Happy Stress Free Life

Everyone has problems but have you noticed that while for some it takes over their life while others don’t seem to let it bother them? What I find amazing is that there are a lot of people who bring it on themselves.  They always look at life as the glass is half full. They complain about what is happening at home, work, school, friends, you name it, all the while blaming the people or situations they’re in as the instigator of the problem. Many times the facts aren’t even known or are sifted through their worldview and have created a distorted view of the issue. 

I’d like to address what started the problem in the first place because that’s the real issue at hand. It happens all the time, first in the home, then school onto work, society, community at large and even world events. What am I referring to? It’s minding your own business.

Think about that for a moment. How many arguments or disagreements have you found yourself in because you or someone else got into your business or you into theirs? How many times has someone made you feel bad about the decisions you’ve made? What’s it to them? How many times have you become upset over what someone else was doing whether it’s at home, work, school etc? Whose business is it anyway? If it doesn’t directly affect you then it’s none of your business.

Most people will recognize when someone is getting into their business but don’t realize when they’re doing it to someone else. A good indicator would be to hypothetically switch places and see how you’d react in their shoes.

The solution to a happier stress-free life - mind your own business.

Monday, May 18, 2015

Hey, did you read the sign?

Signs are all over the place. I’m not talking about the advertisement or freeway signs; I’m talking about the signs that are meant especially for you.  Like when you’re on your cell phone while you’re driving and run through a red light or you put in a different CD and almost hit the car in front of you.  These are all signs. The sign is you should pay attention.  The next time you might not be so lucky.   

There are other signs that you might be getting but aren’t paying attention to that can clue you into what your gifts are.  You may actually brush them off as nothing because it’s so familiar and easy for you. I’ll give you a personal example.  In high school I always got A’s in speech class.  When I went onto college I also aced speech class.  I never gave this much thought or credit.  Quite a few years later I took a facilitator course through work.  For three days I listened attentively and took notes.  On the last day we each had to give a presentation.  After I finished mine the other students gave me feedback. They were shocked that I was so enthusiastic and full of energy because while as a student I was very quiet.  My presentation was well thought out, organized and presently very professionally.  I basically “turned on” when I got in front of a group.  I realized much later that I received basically the same type of feedback when I interviewed for a position.  They were shocked because I was bubbly, as they put it, and yet when it came to answering a question I was very knowledgeable about the subject.  For years now I have been a member of Toastmasters International and I get the same kind of comments.  I have very natural expressions and mannerisms. I exude enthusiasm and energy when I speak and that I’m knowledgeable in what I speak about.

The point with all this is that I was given signs of my ability to speak and express myself throughout my life but I wasn’t paying attention.  I didn’t give it the credit it deserved.

My question to you is there signs that you have been given that you haven’t been paying attention to? Think about that for a moment. What has come easily for you or you get positive comments on it? That’s a sign.

Monday, May 11, 2015

Make it a Great Day. The Choice is Yours

You have the power to decide what kind of day, week, or hour it is going to be, how, by your thoughts. You make that decision every moment of every day if you're going to allow something to ruin your mood. When something doesn't go as you planned do you sulk or worse yet, try to bring others into your doom and gloom. The saying goes that birds of a feather flock together and being in the negative is the same thing. If you didn't have an audience, would you continue on your path of complaint, most likely not? While in the negative you seek others who will buy into your story about how things aren't working out for you. The good news is that you can change and it's all up to you. Take responsibility and own the power that is within you. You decide what effect an event is going to have on you. Don't let the circumstance own you. You own it. You decide. You make the conscious choice when something doesn't go right to immediately figure out what you learned from it and then put it where it belongs, in the past. Only then can you clear your mind and forge ahead with a clear open mind and make it a great day no matter what happened.

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Getting What You’re Giving


Have you ever noticed that the more someone complains about their life situation the more they stay in it and the people who have a cheerful disposition tend to have more of the same?  Why is that? More important, what creates the difference?  Is it the situation that determines how someone will react or is it the person who decides how to react to the situation? I believe it’s the latter.

Someone who comes from a place of being a victim believes that things happen to them and they have little or no control over what happens to them.  They don’t see any connection between how they react and what life experiences come their way.  Their viewpoint is that things happen to them and thus remain in a state of “what is.”

On the other hand, the person who looks for the positive aspect of the situation remains emotionally in a much better place and therefore attracts better life experiences. Other people respond in kind and therefore they get what they give.

You may think that isn’t possible but I’m sure you’ve been in a situation where two people experience the same event, one person reacts very irate and upset over it while the other one reacts rather calmly about it, same situation different reaction. What does this tell you? It says that you are the creator of your experiences.  You can choose to be happy or choose to be sad. You can choose to be the victim or you can choose to take charge of your life.  You have the free will to choose.  Isn’t that awesome!

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

You Have All the Resources You Need


I have good news. You can’t have a desire without the resources to fulfill that desire presently. It’s one of the universal laws.

What that means is that you have all the resources you need in this moment in time to achieve your desires otherwise you wouldn’t have the desire. Interesting, huh!  It means it’s within your reach and all you have to do is allow it to come into your experience.  However, this is where people tend to get stuck.  Their mindset is stuck on unworthiness and/or lack.  They feel they are not worthy of their desires or that they lack the skill, knowledge etc to achieve them. They falsely believe they don’t have the resources available to them to achieve their goals. Or maybe everything isn’t in perfect order yet so they don’t allow that which is ready to appear.  Another false belief is that there is a limit to the amount of joy, happiness or material possessions etc. they can have so they don’t allow that which is ready to come into their experience to manifest itself. 

Hey, don’t get down on yourself. We all have had moments like that. In times like that it’s good to catch yourself and get back into a good feeling emotion of what it would feel like when you do fulfill your desire.  Remind yourself of all you have to offer and that you wouldn’t have the desire if you didn’t have the ability to achieve it. 

Having the desire is the easy part, not believing and trusting in yourself is what keeps you from getting what you want.  All the classes, applications, assessments and seminars won’t help you until you allow and accept what you want to come to you without hesitation, questioning and judging. 

Monday, April 27, 2015

Here’s Looking at You Kid


"What a jerk! He's always getting away with something, and her, what a gossip. You can't tell her anything unless you want the whole world to know it. They're so arrogant and pompous. What a pair!"

"Look at that big boat they just got. How can they afford it with the two trips they already took this year? I heard he lost money in his business last year".

Mmm. Have you ever found yourself talking about someone in a negative way? Of course you have. We have all done it at one time or another. But what are we really saying? In "The Work" that Byron Katie uses there is the turnaround question. In it you are asked to replace yourself with whomever you are speaking about. It's not easy. It's not pretty. But, it is probably true that what you dislike and/or envy in another person is what you don't like about yourself or an item or quality you wish you had. It's called looking in the mirror. A mirror is a reflection of your physical self but in this case it is a reflection of your inner self.

I highly recommend the book, "Loving What Is" by Byron Katie. This is but a speck of what The Work is all about. There are four questions in the book to ask you along with examples of how others used the model. I call it self-awareness therapy.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Will the Truth Set You Free?


Recently I was in the hot seat for something I said. A person had accused me of some things to my superior and the superior’s reaction was to move me to another location for a while. What caused me to be in trouble is that I truthfully told others why I was being moved and what caused the move. Basically I got in trouble for telling the truth. Even my superior found it odd that I didn’t lie, fib or be vague about the change.

My question is why? Why should I lie? What do I have to hide? People who lie have something to hide or are trying to save face. In my case, I have no problem exposing myself. Why, because the truth will set me free?

How so you ask? Will it get me out of my bind? I don’t know but what it will do is free my conscious mind of any negative feelings. By telling the truth my spirit is at peace.

I think deep down my parents knew this. As a child I would have been is greater trouble for lying then by telling the truth no matter what the outcome.  I still may have received a lecture but there wouldn’t be any severe punishment.  My parents choose to reward truthfulness. I must say that the lesson was passed down as I too would be more upset over catching my child lying about what she did or said. It certainly sends a strong message of what is important.

I’ve spoken about this before but imagine if you knew the true intentions of your employer, spouse or politician? Would you make the same conclusion about them? Would you stay employed or move on? Would you still vote for the politician who only said the things you wanted to hear but in reality had no intention of following through with them? Everything is out in the open.

Let’s say you did choose to stay or vote knowing the truth, what then? Well then you only have yourself to blame when it doesn’t work out the way you’d like it to. It’s not what people like to hear but it’s the truth.

Truth, responsibility and freedom are intertwined. Knowing the truth and taking responsibility for your decisions really does give you freedom because knowing the truth helps you make better decisions. The truth can be harsh but in the end it really does set you free.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Visualization + Action = GO!

"I would visualize things coming to me. It would just make me feel better. Visualization works if you work hard. That's the thing. You can't just visualize and go eat a sandwich." -- Jim Carrey

Visualize the life you want but don't stop there. Pay attention to divine guidance as it directs you to your dream but don't stop there either. Say YES to its call. And then take action.

That's how you create the life you want. That’s how professional athletes do it. If you can’t visualize it happening in your life then it can’t happen. Notice how you feel when you do visualize. Do you get anxious and excited? Do you find yourself getting just so far and then getting stuck? That’s a notice for you. It means there’s a belief inside you that’s not allowing you to move to the next level. Keep visualizing until you can get past that mental and emotional roadblock. It’s not that you have to know the “how” of how it all comes about but that you emotionally feel it coming into your life. It’s not an “if” but a “when.”

Keep visualizing, listening and acting.

It'll take you places!