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Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 13, 2018

Wake Up!

Wake Up!

Have you ever found yourself driving along a familiar roadway and suddenly realize where you were and thought to yourself, “Did I remember to stop at that stop sign?”

That’s sometimes referred to letting your mind wonder, zoning out or drifting. Don’t get stressed out about it. You’re not the only one it happens to. We all tend to lose our conscious awareness of what’s going on particularly when we’re around familiar or uninteresting situations.

Let’s face it. It’s difficult to be fully conscious at every moment all day long. But it’s when you’ll discover how alive you really are because you’ll become totally engaged in the present moment.

Being conscious means to synthesize, organize and direct our thoughts from the “how” you are “what” you should be conscious of in your mind.

There are ways to determine to be more present and therefore more conscious of your surroundings.
a)   Be conscious of your thoughts. Ask yourself where you should focus your thoughts right now.
b)   Be conscious of your physical and emotional now. What is your energy level and how shall I feel right now.
c)   Your behavior speaks volumes on which you are and dictates your results in life as well as how others feel about you.
d)   Be conscious of others. Imagine what it would feel to be in their place and what kind of mindset does the other person have.
e)   What is your progress? Are you moving forward, taking the necessary actions, managing your thoughts, feelings, behaviors and relationships that will help you progress and grow?
f)    Be conscious of the present moment. It means being fully aware and attentive but at the same time you release yourself from any expectation. Be at peace with and fully present with what is.
g)   Be conscious of coincidence and intuition. There are no coincidences and trust your gut instinct. It’s your personal survival mechanism.
h)   Finally, live in wonder. Remind yourself what it was like to be a child and marvel at all the life going on around you.

Eckhart Tolle has a few books out on accessing the present moment but I’d like to recommend two others. “Loving What Is” by Byron Katie, is a really good book about learning how to see the beauty in what is. The other book, “The Precious Present” by Spencer Johnson, is a short story you can read to your children but it’s a lesson for all of us.

Let me know how these books work out for you.

I’m trying to free your mind, Neo. But I can only show you the door. You’re the one who must walk through it” ~ Morpheus from The Matrix


Source: The Charge by Brendon Burchard

Tuesday, February 6, 2018

Living Out Side the Box

Living Out Side the Box

I’ve never really like the term “outside the box”.  I didn’t know I was in a box but I guess that’s the point. You don’t’ know you are until you start thinking differently, viewing the same criteria but from another angle.

Now there are ways to get you to think outside the box - by accessing your right brain.  You can do something physical like run, play a sport, meditate or just take a walk.  Some people can access it by reading, painting, writing, listening to music or having an enlightened conversation.  Figure out what works for you. 

You know you’re accessing your right brain when out of the blue the solution to a problem you’ve been working on suddenly pops into your head and Ka...BAM there’s the answer. This has happened to me many times. I’ll be sitting at my desk working on a solution to a problem and not getting anywhere with it yet I can feel the answer is just eluding me.  I decide to take a break. I get up from my chair and take a few steps and ka...BAM the answer suddenly pops into my head. Four seconds ago I was stuck and now I have the answer.  Amazing!
But how do you go about living outside the box? The box represents your comfort level.  In order to live outside it, to excel and become what you know you can be, you need to have the courage, strength and perseverance to continue to grow.  And you know you’re growing and expanding your world when the thought of doing something makes you a bit scared yet excited at the same time. It’s what takes you to the next level. 

People don’t just fall into their greatness.

People don’t become fulfilled by playing it safe.

People succeed by their growth spurts, each one elevating them higher and higher to greater outcomes until one day they stop and realize it was all the little things that made them who they are.

I know living outside my own box is not always an easy thing to do. For me it’s much easier to fall back into the comfortable business aspect of my business instead of expanding my spiritual aspect.  It’s a conflict of interest.  My spirit says to speak my truth while my natural talents want me to fall back into the to-do list of running a business.

Guess who wants to win?


My spirit continues to push me to live outside my box.  I’m not going to lie, it’s a bit scary and uncomfortable but I’m getting so much more out of life. How about you?

Tuesday, January 30, 2018

What Makes a Good Leader?

What Makes a Good Leader?

As populations increase and cultures and people become more diverse, more issues and problems face us more than ever before. Many people assume these problems and important issues will be taken care of by government but this assumption is becoming less and less of a reality. Many of the critical issues and problems are the kind government is least equipped to handle. And some of the issues and problems are caused by government itself.

This is why the world needs strong, competent leaders now more than ever before. Progress can only happen when someone assumes a leadership role – when someone tackles these problems and takes action to solve the problem and correct the injustice.

There are plenty of managers out there but what propels someone to leadership status? What is it that a leader has that a manager or an authority person doesn’t have?

We tend to admire people who can lead-people who can capture our imaginations, turn us on to important ideas, and recruit our energies for great and noble purposes. Progress happens when someone decides that a better way exists and influences others to find that better way.

What is it that these great leaders had while many others try and fail?
There are leaders who are followed because they have authority, they have a formal title or rank and command respect and attention like Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln and George S Patton.  People follow them because they are the boss.  On the other spectrum there are people who are leaders who have earned their leaderships status without a title. They are respected and followed for what they stand for like Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King and Mohandas Gandhi.
In all cases, these leaders were individuals who knew how to influence others. They understood people and they knew how to use the tools of authority. Of course the ideal way to influence is to have both formal authority and earned authority. Interestingly, it is common for a person with no formal authority and high earned authority to have greater influence over others than someone who has high formal authority but little or no earned authority. Just look at what MLK, Mother Teresa and Gandhi accomplished. They earned the respect, trust and allegiance of those who followed them. In retrospect, can you say the same thing about the bosses you’ve had, your government officials or even the Presidents of the U. S.?

Today leaders are being asked to provide a new kid of authority; service leadership. This viewpoint suggests that the role of a leader, no matter what type of authority is involved, is to lead by helping or enabling others, not by forcing them. It requires the capacity to lead both with a focus on service to those benefiting from the end result, and to those who do the work achieving the objectives. Such leadership requires working with a spirit and set of values that emphasize worthwhile contributions. Service leaders see their role as enabling or empowering others to accomplish something worthy. They are willing to place empowerment above personal power; contribution above their own ego satisfaction; and the needs of the team above their own needs for credit and acclaim.

With that said, how many people do you know who qualify as a leader? Are you a leader?


Source: Toastmaster International –High Performance Leadership

Thursday, January 25, 2018

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses – ENOUGH already!

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses – ENOUGH already!

Excuses keep you small. They keep you from having a fulfilling life, reaching your goals and ultimately achieving the happiness you so desperately deserve and crave.

Every excuse keeps you from becoming all you can be. It’s fear rearing its ugly head and stopping you in your tracks. It casts self-doubt in your abilities and knowledge. It really serves no purpose but to keep you staying small and comfortable in your current position.

Why! It’s easier to find an excuse than do what’s necessary to achieve your dreams. The problem is by not facing your excuse, thus fear, it can have a snowball effect.

If you don’t do your taxes on time because you know you might owe money you’ll end up owing even more money because you didn’t pay your taxes on time.

There is also a physical and emotional by product of making excuses. Deep down you know you should take action but the very prolonged in-action can cause anxiety, restlessness, depression and unexplained outbursts because you’re holding the disappointment of yourself inside. Fear exhibits itself in procrastination and indecision.

The best course of action is to confront the excuse and take action on it. Be it a job, weight, project or a relationship problem confront it by making a decision and taking action on it.

Another way to think about it is how would you feel if everything you’ve been meaning to do and be came true? How would that make you feel? How would you show up in the world?

Would you feel relaxed, free, like the weight of the world had been lifted off your shoulders? When you blame others as your excuse it gives them power over you. You’ve just given them the power to dictate your outcome whether you’re aware of it or not. You’re essentially saying that this agency, group of people, history and society is the cause of you not achieving your goals.  It keeps you from taking responsibility for your life and keeps you small.


You can remain small in your excuses or you can take control by taking responsibility for your own outcome. Only then will you truly be free. 

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Mistakes, Missteps, Regrets – They’re Memories Made

Mistakes, Missteps, Regrets – They’re Memories Made

There is something out the ordinary about experiencing major setbacks and disappointments in your life. It’s as if when you’re not paying attention the Universe will put something directly in your path that you can’t avoid.  You must deal with it
There are no coincidences so it must have been put there for a reason.  Some of the most time-consuming, annoying, and inconvenient setbacks have also been the most memorable because I learned something from them or because it allowed me to explore something new.

One of my most memorable setbacks was when I took a trip to California with my girlfriend. Our plan was to spend a week in San Francisco, hit the wine country, and on one of our last days to drive through Yosemite National Park on our way to Reno, spend a day there and then fly out the following day. It didn’t go as planned.

The drive into the heart of Yosemite takes two hours. When we got there we were just in awe of its beauty. The combination of trees, fresh water creeks and rock formations was breathtaking. It was then that I decided if I could live anywhere in the world, this would be it.

We walked and drove around the area but then needed to be on our way as the drive out of Yosemite also takes two hours and we had to make it to our hotel in Reno. I always did the planning of our trips and since we wanted to see as much as possible in two weeks our time frames were pretty tight. Part way out of Yosemite our rental car stalled on the mountain side. It took hours before anyone actually stopped to ask why two young women were parked along the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. Sure vehicles went by but they were far and few between. By the time were heard them through the dense forest they had already gone by. Usually it was when a vehicle honked that we were aware there was another motorist on the road. Eventually someone going into the park stopped. They said they’d let someone know about us. A few hours later a tow truck came to bring us back to the main area.

We now had two problems. It was almost 10 PM when we arrived back at the main area and they wouldn’t be able to work on our vehicle until the next day. The second problem is we were stuck there and had no place to stay. The driver found us a cabin with community restroom facilities to use. Whew!
Since we hadn’t eaten since lunch we were starving so the driver took us to a grocery store. We had ten minutes to find what we wanted before it closed.
In a cabin with two beds and two dressers we had the time of our lives. In our haste to acquire food we neglected to get some utensils. There we were with a fully cooked chicken and no way to eat it but with our hands. We had chips, chicken and a cocktail to drown our mishap. We DID remember cups for the alcohol. We sat on our respective beds while trying to eat bare handed and laughing at how barbaric we must appear. We reminiscing and laughed like crazy. Eventually we decided to find the community restroom in total darkness. That was a challenge and a whole other story.

The next day our vehicle was fixed by noon and the tow truck driver asked how our night was. We told him we had so much fun. He then asked if we went to a certain lodge. “There’s a lodge with music!” No, we didn’t go there. Well then he figured we must have gone to another lodge. We were a bit embarrassed to say we didn’t know any of those places he mentioned and that we instead had a blast hanging out together in our cabin. He was a bit shocked.
We never got to see Reno. When I look back I don’t think Reno would have been as much fun as the time we just had.

In the end it taught me to slow down and enjoy the ride. The vacation wasn’t just about getting from one tourist attraction to another but to enjoy the scenery and the company I was with. Mission accomplished.

This is just one story I have about inconvenient setbacks that I’ve experienced. The one thing that stands out in all of them is that they may have been annoying and inconvenient but I always gained something out of it.


How about you? Are your setbacks really a mask for something else to happen in your life?

Thursday, January 18, 2018

Love Equals Caring as much as Caring Equals Love

Love Equals Caring as much as Caring Equals Love

Let’s make a distinction about love. There’s the romantic love that is felt between two people, the love of your children, family and friends. But caring encompasses a broader sense of love in that it’s the love of all that is. It’s the love of life and everything we experience in it.

We show kindness and caring to one another through the simple act of opening a door for someone, asking how someone is doing and actually listening to their response, even cleaning up after yourself so that others won’t have to deal with your mess.  These are but a few of the everyday acts of caring that we demonstrate to one another. The capacity to care and be cared for is a human strength. It’s what connects us to one another.

When you don’t demonstrate care to others consistently, life loses its color and connection. You may end up feeling less engaged with those around you. If you’re not making a point to be caring of others in your life, the people around you don’t feel cared for, love, appreciated, respected or engaged by you at the heart level. When this happens they may contact you less frequently, trust you less, buy from you less, and leave you more. It’s an easy formula to figure out: care more, connect more.

Our drive for caring, in a broad sense, makes us feel that we are safe, worthy, and loved, through our own actions and the actions of others, we are cared for.  Caring is something you do and receive.

Of all the human drives, caring seems to get the least attention. Instead, caring’s sexier sister, Love, gets all the attention, despite the fact that it’s probably impossible to feel or demonstrate love without caring.  Plus you likely wouldn’t be kind if you didn’t care. Kindness, caring, love - as you can see they’re all connected.  

We’re all hardwired to demonstrate care for others. Our brains are remarkably well equipped biologically to relate to and care for others’ emotions and experiences. What that means is our brains are built to mimic that which we see and feel in others. It’s why when you walk into a room you pick up the energy of the room and your brain starts to mimic it whether it’s a sad or happy occasion. The more we experience that state and behavior the more we start to mimic it. So if we constantly see others behaving a certain way our brains will likely tell us to mimic that behavior. It’s a key reason why kids smoke when others smoke, why infants smile when their moms smile, and why so many of us yawn or feel impatient when someone else does. We feel what we see.


Caring is more than just a nice action. It’s the basis for our human existence and experience and the foundation that makes love possible. 

Thursday, January 11, 2018

Shining Light on the Lies and Deceit

Shining Light on the Lies and Deceit


Sai Baba was an Avatar in India and was worth over a billion US dollars when he left his body on Easter Sunday, April 24th 2011. He almost never gave interviews, so this is very special.
This extract is from a conversation between a report and the Social and Spiritual Reformer of India, Sathya Sai Baba.
I usually write my own material but I thought this was worth passing along. It’s rather long but you need to read it in its entirety in order to get the full picture of what he’s saying. It’s a different way of thinking and one I think we as a human race are embarking on. The things that he says have also been verified by other sources to be true. We as a human race need to listen to it.
v   
Sai Baba: The truth is that the planet has been changing its vibratory state, and this change has intensified since the year 1989 where the magnetic poles have moved the last 20 years more than the past 2000. Well, in one way there are several prophecies that signal this date like a term or important conclusion in the history of humanity, but the most significant is the end of the Mayan calendar, which prophecy has been interpreted in different ways. The most negative ones think that during this year the world will end, but it will not be like that, it is known that during that year a new era will start, the Age of Aquarius.

This has to do with the rotation of the whole solar system (solar cycle) that goes passing through the different eras each one of them lasts 5125 years. The era in which we now are, called the Age of Pisces, started on the year 3113 B.C. and ends on 2012. If there is a change on the earth's magnetism, there is a change on the consciousness and also an adaptation at the physical level for this new vibration. The changes are not only on our planet, but also affect the whole universe, and today's science can verify that.

Inform yourself about the changes on the solar storms (that are magnetic storms) and you will see that scientists are up to date with these things, or ask about the movement of the magnetic poles during the last years, and airports having to modify their instruments.

This change on the magnetism translates or it's perceived as an increment of light, or an increase on the planet's vibration. For you to understand it easily you must know that this vibration is affected and intensified due to the consciousness of all human beings. Each thought, each emotion, each new awakening of a human being towards the consciousness of God elevates the vibration of the planet. This might seem a paradox, due to the fact that the majority sees around themselves more hatred and misery, but this is not so.

There are many, even if I would like them to be more, that are trying to get out of darkness to grow and become a better Son of God. I have been saying this on previous messages, each one chooses where to focus the view, and those who only see the darkness are focused on the drama, the pain and the injustice. If you don't see the spiritual advancement that humanity has made it is because you haven't focused on it, but if you do the right work and liberate your mind of the negative you will open a space where you will be able to manifest your divine essence that will put on the focus of what is really happening with humanity and the planet.

Q: "Humanity is elevating its consciousness as never before."But how…Can’t you see the darkness?"

Yes, I see it, but I don't identify myself with it, I'm not afraid of it...How can I fear darkness if I see such clear light? Of course I understand those who fear, because I have also been standing where I could only see the evil. This is why now I feel love for all of that. Darkness it's not a force contrary to the light, it is absence of light. You cannot invade the light with darkness, that is not how the principle of light works. Fear, drama, injustice, hate and sadness only exist in states of darkness, because you can't see the global context in which your life develops, and the only way to see from the light when you are there is through faith. Once you have increased your vibration and frequency (state of consciousness) you will be able to see towards darkness and understand what you have lived.

Q: "But...How can you say this if there is more evil in the world every day?"

There is not more evil...there is "more light", and that is what I'm talking about on this message. Imagine that you have a room or warehouse where for years you have been storing your things and is lit by a 40 w. bulb. Change the bulb to a 100 w. and you will see what happens. You will see the mess and the dust you didn't think existed. The dirt will be clearer. This is what is happening, and this makes possible that a lot of people are reading this without thinking of it as foolish, like it could have been some years ago.

Have you noticed that today lies and deceit come to the surface faster than before? Well, to access God's understanding and life's functioning is also faster than before. This new vibration of the planet is what is making everyone nervous, depressed or sick, because to be able to receive more light and to rise to that vibrational level, people have to change physically as well as mentally, they have to change the way they think and feel, and delete or eradicate from their lives such beliefs or parameters that generally differ from reality or that take them towards the negative side of things.

You must put your warehouses in order, because each day you are receiving more light on your consciousness and even if you want to avoid it, you should start putting your hands on the project and start the cleaning or decide to live in the middle of the dirt.

This change creates physical discomforts, pains on the body, on the skeleton system and most of the time; the medical tests can't find the reason or illness that provokes it. Generally they relate it with stress or nervous states; nothing farther from the truth, because these discomforts are provoked due to negative emotions accumulated during our lives, fears and anxieties that you have carried with you always and that now have the opportunity to transcend and transmute. It's about that dust accumulated for years that you are now seeing, for it to be cleaned.

There will be nights when you will wake up and stay up for a few hours...don't alter yourself, read a book, watch TV, meditate, don't fight thinking there is something wrong with you, it's the new vibration of the planet that you're assimilating, you will go back to sleep and the next day you will not feel a need to sleep more.

If you don't flow with this process properly, the pains will be more intense and you will be diagnosed fibromyalgia, which is a name that medicine has given to these pains that have no visible cause and for which they offer no treatment with concrete results, they only give you a prescription for antidepressants and this makes you escape the opportunity to change your life.

One more time you chose which reality you want to live, only this time the drama will be more intense and of course will be the love. If the Light is increased, also is the lack of need for it, this explains why there is so much irrational violence during the last years.

We are living the best time that humanity has ever lived, we will be witnesses and actors of the biggest transformation of consciousness that you have ever imagined.

Inform yourself; wake up your unrest for these subjects. Science knows that something is happening; you know that something is happening; we all know that many changes are happening in many levels. Be a conscious actor of these changes and don't let them take you by surprise because you don't know what is happening.

Tuesday, January 9, 2018

Confessions are Good for the Soul.

Confessions are Good for the Soul.

You confess all the time to your friends, siblings, parents, coworkers and even strangers.  Any time you do something you feel guilty about or to right a wrong your conscious says “I must tell someone”. It could be that you took some supplies from your work or that you said something bad about someone. For some reason you feel compelled to tell a trusted friend. Why? It makes you feel better about yourself when you can clear your conscious.

You don’t need to go to a Pastor, Priest or Rabbi to confess so you can feel better, you can do it yourself. It’s not about receiving forgiveness from someone else but about forgiving yourself. For some, confessing to a spiritual leader is part of their religious practice. What the spiritual leader does is give you a formal format and suggestions to help you allow you to forgive yourself.

Forgiveness is about allowing you to love yourself again. It’s about erasing any labels you may have put upon yourself and being nonjudgmental about your thoughts and actions. 

Sin isn’t a very good word. It has such a negative emotion attached to it as if it’s eternal. It promotes fear and primarily stops you from loving yourself. And for some it controls them. That’s not a very good way to live.

I always wondered way criminals would eventually have to tell someone what they did or give themselves up. When you look at confessing from this mind set it makes sense. They need to confess to clear their conscious so that they can feel better about themselves so they can love again. It’s a pretty messed up way to love but spiritually they need to do it.   


What are your thoughts on this?

Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Karma Works Like a Boomerang

Your Actions are like a Boomerang

It’s been said many times in different ways but it basically means the same thing.

·         Karma.
·         You reap what you sow
·         What comes around goes around.
·         The Law of Attraction. 

It all means the same thing and it bears repeating because people aren’t getting it.  You get back what you give

For example there’s the women who is upset when she’s not respected, chances are she’s not respecting herself because she’d allowing someone to treat her badly. She needs to respect herself enough to do whatever it takes to get address it or get away from that person or situation.

Or, the guy who vents that the world is racist yet doesn’t see that he’s racist against another group. He doesn’t get that if he wants the world to change, it starts with him. He must become what he wants the world to be.

Morgan Freeman gets it, “If you want to stop racism stop talking about it”.
How about the person who is always asking for a hand out but never takes the initiative to help others? Why should anyone care about you when you don’t care enough about yourself to improve your situation?

See a pattern here?

What goes around comes around. It’s the Law of Attraction at work.  You get back what you think about most.  If you believe you’re frequently disrespected than that’s what you’ll see through your lens, disrespect. Your view will be steered to the times you’re disrespected instead of remembering how many times you were respected. The same goes for anything else.

Call it what you will but life has a way of balancing itself out. It may appear that life is unfair but I’ve found that eventually the person or company who treated me badly, cut me off in traffic, discriminated against me etc. gets what they deserve. It may take a few years but they do reap what they sow.
 

Remember the boomerang is designed to return to you. 

Thursday, December 28, 2017

Baby Love

Baby Love is Disguised as Self-Love

Babies are so easy to love even if they do keep you up at night and dirty their diapers several times a day.  Their miniature hands, feet, tummy and face are just too adorable to resist. They’re a mini you.

You find yourself thrilled with each new stage of development and going through great lengths just to get a little smile.  Who would have thought such a little bundle of sleepless nights could have so much power over you and yet bring you so much joy.

As she physically develops you start noticing which parent the features came from.  Even though you realize she’s going to end up with her daddy’s big nose you love her just the same.

You see the parts that came from you, the nicely shaped eyebrow, the long legs and even those ugly stubby toes of yours but you love her just the same.
And as the child grows you start to notice some aspects, talents, and personality traits of both parents.  Some you like and some you don’t but you love her just the same.

Isn’t it amazing haw you can love all those attributes, both physically and personality wise in your child but you have a hard time loving those same things in yourself?

Your child is a reflection of you and the other parent. Therefore, when you love your child even with all their ups and downs, in essence you love yourself.


Did you ever think of it that way before?

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Dog Lessons

We could Learn a Lot From Dogs

First off there’s forgiveness.  It doesn’t matter how bad a dog is treated he wants so much to have your acceptance and approval that he’ll come back to you.  He may roll over and submit, rub his nose under your hand as if to say pet me or lick any part of your body like he’s trying to say I’m sorry.  It’s sweet and how can you not forgive him when he’s just turned around and gave you his affection even though he’s misbehaved.  Too bad people aren’t as quick to say I’m sorry and give forgiveness to each other

Second, when he’s making amends with all those gesture he’s killing you with his kindness.  The slight tilt of his head, the pink tongue hanging out and the sad eyes sure do work in his favor.  How can you resist?

Third, the need for affection is amazing. What dog doesn’t like to be petted and have his tummy rubbed? Then there’s the out of now where lick on your hand, face, leg, you name it.  Let’s not forget the cuddling, if you can call it that. It’s when the dog likes to lie right next to you. In some instances he basically takes any area around, top, or side of you and lies across your body. Whatever position he finds most comfortable.  Sometimes I think they believed your part of the furniture.

Forgiveness, kindness, and affection - sounds like love to me.  I believe every part of nature is here for a purpose.  Maybe dogs were put here to show us what love looks like.


Your thoughts? 

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Turning the Table

Turning the Table

Turn the table is a term used most frequently used in the restaurant industry as the act of moving from one set of customers to another on the same table.  They need to turn the table as in how many times they can service the table with new customers.

You also can turn the table in your own life. Sometimes you have to just to turn the table and move on even if you haven’t come to a conclusion or closure in your relationship or career.  It can be a difficult decision to make because so often you want some type of closure and there just isn’t one coming.
It’s the times when you stay in a relationship hoping that things will change for the better or the career path you’re on just isn’t panning out.  Most often when people look back at those times they wished they would have made the decision to move on a lot sooner.  Fear of the unknown is what keeps a person hanging on.

There are so many ways to say it, move on, get over it, get out while you still can and turning table is just another way. When the taste for the endeavor already leaves a sour taste in your mouth you should have already turned the table otherwise you just end up building up resentment. And who do you have to blame for that, yourself for not moving on sooner?


Are you in a situation like that now?  Trust your gut feelings and do what’s best for you.  It’s the only way you’ll feel good about yourself. 

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Searching for Mr. Right

Searching for Mr. Right

Women and men will go to great lengths searching for their Mister or Misses Right, their soul mate, as if there were only ONE person on this whole entire planet that is right for you. That would be a cruel God and its just nonsense.

What if your Mr. Right lives on another continent?
What if that person has just passed on?
What if that person is just being born?
What if that person is already married, then what? Are you doomed to a life of unhappiness? Hardly!

If that were true, look at all the happy partnerships that end in death only to be reborn again in another partnership. It’s not the same but then it never could be.  There are too many facets to a person’s personality.  Where on one alliance brings out some attributes another taps into others.  It’s a mixed blessing, the end of one but the beginning of something new, a new adventure.
A soul mate is a person’s spirit that one feels completely combatable with, as if they were made for each other.  It’s the Ying and Yang complimenting each other.  There’s a deep connection.

However, every spirit (soul) belongs to a soul group and that group is very connected. So much so, that they show up around you in your friends, family, neighbors, community, co-workers and relationships.  You are connected to these people for a reason. Have you ever met someone and felt an instant connection with that person but you never met them before yet some how you’re very comfortable expressing yourself?  It’s as if you’ve know each other for a long time?  Well, you have.  You’re both in the same soul group which can consist of thousands of spiritual beings.

Therefore, the good news is there isn’t just one person for you so keep looking.  Don’t bypass someone just because he or she doesn’t fit your ideal mate.  Instead be aware of any connection you feel.

(Source: Light Collective - Kathryn Harwig)

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Retire! Bah Hum Bug

Retire! Bah Hum Bug

You’re as young as you feel , saving the best for last or it isn’t over till I say it’s over might describe the individuals who continue to learn, achieve and grow well into retirement years.  It’s as if they’re just hitting their stride.  Age is but a number.

They have such drive and sense of purpose that it propels them to continue to learn and grow.  Now with the wisdom they’ve earned through the years they’re able to continue to make their mark. What’s interesting is that their achievements are from different venues; fashion, political, athletic, education, science, music and the arts. It’s a true testament that it’s not over until you say it is.

The achievements of the following individuals didn’t happen overnight but were an accumulation and extension of what they’ve already experienced.
Arriving at one goal is the starting point to another” ~John Dewey
Take a look at just some of the well known individuals who made or continued to achieve and grow in their 70’s.

70 – Dr. William Mayo founds a medical clinic which will bear his name.
71 – Fashion icon Coco Chanel debuts the Chanel suit.
72 – Karl Wallenda, of the famous Flying Wallendas, walks a high wire between the Eden Rock and Fontianebleau hotels in Paris.
73 – Ronald Reagan is elected President of the United States.
74 – Ethel Andrus founds the American Association of Retired Persons (AARP).
75 – Piano virtuoso Claudio Arrau stays busy ion his seventy-fifth year, performing a total of 110 concerts.
76 – Thomas Jefferson begins designing buildings and developing curricula for the University of Virginia.
77 – Astronaut (and Senator) John Glenn returns to space on the Space Shuttle Discovery mission.
78 – Grandma Moses begins her career as a serious painter.
79 – Giuseppe Verdi composed the opera Falstaff.

There are people all around that are still learning and growing well into their retirement years.  Take my grandpa for example.  He finally gave up dairy farming at the ripe old age of 75.  That’s hard work at any age.  However he didn’t retire, that wasn’t his nature.  He rented out his land to another farmer and took up raising heifers and peacocks.  He also had taken up woodworking in his later years and now that he had more time he began making even more and difficult pieces. No he wasn’t famous but he did set an example for his children and grandchildren to follow.  He finally passed on when he was 91 years old.
What does this tell me? That when you stay engaged in life, have a sense of meaning and purpose you are more likely to live longer and enjoy it more too.


What does it say to you?

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

How Do You Show Up?



What the heck does that mean? Show up. When you need to have a conversation about a possible unpleasant topic, are you already upset about the subject? Do you assume there may be a dispute about it or are you gearing up for a confrontation? How do you enter that conversation then? Are you scared, tense, angry, frustrated, or apprehensive about what may happen? Whatever you are thinking, that is how you will show up. It manifests itself in our language, gestures, and body language. You could be saying all the right words, in your mind, and yet the other person is taking offense or doesn't understand your viewpoint. In essence you are giving mixed signals. If you are expecting a confrontation, your language will indicate that in subtle ways by choosing certain words that heads off a possible disagreement with your viewpoint, all the while standing rigid, arms crossed, and speaking in a cordial and professional voice.

What do you do then? Check in with yourself. Ask yourself what is the goal here. Is it to get your way or is it to accomplish something. Once you have grasped what the ultimate goal is, then you can look at the conversation for what it is, a conversation, nothing more, nothing less. Imagine entering into the conversation without no assumptions, expectations, or judgments. It is what it is.

Woody Allen said that 80% of success is just showing up. He meant physically being there but I think it could also be applied to how you're showing up in your interactions. The success of an interaction is based on how you show up for it. It’s also said that 90% of conflicts are due to your tone of voice while only 10% is for the conflict itself.


How you show up can make all the difference in the world on the outcome you receive. 

Thursday, September 14, 2017

Save the Earth


I’ve always wondered why some very healthy people, by all accounts, will fall ill and never recover while some old crusty guy chain smokes and drinks himself into old age without much effect on him.

It doesn’t seem fair, does it?
I think I found the answer.

Mindset

The crusty old guy doesn’t buy into the effects of his bad habits. He doesn’t give them his attention. Instead he believes everything will be okay and that he’ll be just fine, thank you very much. On the other hand, the healthy person “believes” that cancer can kill and some foods are bad for you. Then when something happens to them they believe it will have the effect they believe it will have by what’s been promoted.

Skeptical, it’s the law of attraction at work? You attract what you think about. It comes down to what you believe. When you’re positive it shows up in all that you do from the way you walk, talk and present yourself. It has to. It’s a reflection of your inner mindset.


Need proof?
Check out the Messages in Water videos by Dr. Emoto.  It highlights the effect positive words and intentions have on water at a cellular level versus negative ones. By simply voicing good thoughts, blessing and praying, the chemistry of the water changes. Freaky! If that can happen to water what effect does that have on the rest of the planet? What percentage of plants, animals and humans are made up of water? I don’t know the exact amount but I know it’s a lot and none of us could survive without it.

Imagine simply by praying, blessing or having good intentions about your food will change the cellular structure so much so that what was once seen as unhealthy will only have a good effect on you.

Someone who was concerned about the effect of fracking on water asked the Light collective, channeled by Kathryn Harwig, if it contaminated the water making it unsafe to drink.  Their response was that all water is good. If you believe it is bad for you it will be, but it is all good.


Lesson – if you want to save the earth perhaps having gratitude for what it provides would be a better option. 

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

You Can See Clearly Now



For thousands of years, we have been taught not to judge - but let's face it, we still do it all the time. The truth is that we all have judgments running in our heads.

If you begin by pointing the finger of blame outward, then the focus isn't on you. You can just let loose and be uncensored. We're often quite sure about what other people need to do, how they should live, whom they should be with. We have 20/20 vision about others, but not about ourselves.

When you do The Work, you see who you are by seeing who you think other people are. Eventually you come to see that everything outside you is a reflection of your own thinking. You’re the storyteller, the projector of all stories, and the world is the projected image of your thoughts.

Since the beginning of time, people have been trying to change the world so that they can be happy. This hasn't ever worked because it approaches the problem backward. What The Work gives us is a way to change the projector - mind - rather than the projected. It's like when there's a piece of lint on a projector's lens. We think there's a flaw on the screen, and we try to change this person and that person, whoever the flaw appears to be on next. But it's futile to try to change the projected images. Once we realize where the lint is, we can clear the lens itself. This is the end of suffering, and the beginning of a little joy in paradise.

Find out more about The Work by Byron Katie in; "Loving What Is".

Thursday, September 7, 2017

People Skills Add Flavor to Your Life

Many people do not listen with a clear intent to understand, they usually are concentrating on responding even before the other person has completed his or her thought. As a relationship expert, I would like to share some ideas on this subject so that whether you are looking to grow your business or need to enhance your personal people skills, you can learn to develop a different approach towards building interpersonal relationships.

PRACTICE makes perfect in life! Take advantage of every chance you get to practice your interpersonal skills so that when you have a special opportunity to get your point across or to be noticed, you are equipped with the right approach, style or clarity to affect others in a healthy and beneficial manner. Relationships are part of every aspect of our lives. Become your own relationship expert today so you can improve your people skills and add flavor to your life.

Joan Marie Whelan


Sometimes other people can say things better than I can. Joan Marie is one of them. Many years ago she gave me some very insightful advice. I've always remembered that.